Some people say, when the body needs a break, it will take a break.
People say, every 7 years the body goes through a change, regenerates.
This year I turned 28 nd i feel like instead of getting a cold, or a UTI or sth i just get body ache lol. this april i couldnt play guitar on a tour with an injured arm/hand who was stiff and hurting from overexhaustion.
one and a half week ago, in the space of what I've always felt the most strong, confident, comfortable, safe, undestructable i got hurt again
I know I'm okay because I breath, I can walk, I can talk, think, compose, blah but on a more PSYCHOLOGICAL note this weighed heavy on me,
so I fell backwards as I struggle with balance anyways and crashed right into the drums and when I tried to get up I saw charley and laura next to me saying "andreya it's ok to go off stage if it hurts"
reason behind it is also because this is what i never do - for example at haldern pop festival i crashed my head into lauras guitar and broke down and listened to myself like if i felt sick or sth and decided to keep on going but when i went off stage i went to the car and was traumatized w a mild concussion in a shock and felt like i've abused myself.
so when that happened now iwas laughing and said honestly "i dont know if im ok because im on adrenaline" and whe n i got up i felt ok that was it and went to the back and there i was lying in pain with my hands buried in my face for the next 30 minutes, squeezing one or two tears out of anger (and worry) about myself.
So now im not in new york or not in LA and not travelling and not jumping from space to space talking about what I see and letting things happen to me , now i am just with me, hurting while moving, taking things SLOW
TAKING
THINGS
SLOW
!!!!
in the first couple of days it drove me insane like if anyone of you knows my room, its interior design is based on me not wanting to spend time in my room - its just simple and nothing cozy.
Yesterday, day 9 of me being injured, was the first time I felt like getting cozy and I took time to cook a meal and I did a face mask.
It's so funny to me as when I was away this year for 3 months or so and came back, the thing i wanted to do the least was to be in my room and in berlin. So i kept on travelling. every free days i had i thought about where else i could go. now it feels like my room and berlin is a partner that i had distanced myself from and kind of need to approach again and reconcile with.
Like wtf is going on this year honestly.
Two of the most positive experiences (next to my fav USA tour) were the writing retreats that laura and i did. the stay at the ranch was the most free creatively and inspired i had felt in a long long time, and when we were in italy, looking back it was surreal too
on the last day or so we just recorded bits and bits after another and laura went on the piano and the night before daniel johnston had died which had made me so unexplainably sad
and we played a song where i choked up in the first verse
a painter who was staying there as well, kathryn, and i layed each other the cards and one of thing in the reading said that i should stop being so passive about my life
which i was so confused by because i felt rather active but maybe its true not to throw myself into intense stimulative experiences so things can just happen to me and i actually dont have think about myself -- as my mom has analysed from my insta feed that i like to live "too much in the moment"
but maybe just think about what i actually wanna focus on instead of letting myself live in 1000 different places at ones.
Friday, September 27, 2019
Thursday, February 28, 2019
The blog post i never finished it was Tuesday
I am sitting on a bench at bob hope airport train station. there are two people here: me and someone on the opposite track who i think lives on the bench at the bob hope airport train station.
today i flew from New York into LA, or actually, Burbank, Hollywood.
It is my first time flying into this airport instead of LAX and it couldn’t be a better fit, bob hope airport and I.
But because I am 27 and I am forgetting things, here are just the major events that happened in the last 48h in New York, a city that is dividing my love and heart - and my physical struggle to stay warm in the cold winds.
Today is tuesday. I have twenty minutes until my train arrives.
On Sunday I realized not everything is closed in NYC as it is in catholic Germany.
I went to eat breakfast with my friend h and on our quest to find an authentic bagel shop that is not hiperized we walked deeper into bedstuy and ended up with a egg-bacon-cheese bagel at a fried chicken place that gave me a heartache for the next 6h.
I also drank coffee at this awful cafe which my friend h liked and he laughed at me for being so terrible about it
i was very disappointed at the baristas who were all students and the people inside were all students and it somehow upset me. which i can spare for therapy session.
then i met my friend m who produced most of our upcoming ep in his flat and i met his cat and even though he said i and freaky (name of the cat) would go on well i was very skeptical and freaky was skeptical about me as well (meaning she just didn’t care that i was there) and i don’t blame her. M’s flat is filled with dvds and music and books and a smol studio set up in his room and we talk very much and a lot about music and our lives and it’s the first time i think about all of it again since i’ve left Berlin, like, that this is what I do.
then i met my friend o’s girlfriend, whose house i’m staying at in LA, and she is an actor and singer and in a musical workshop and she told me how she flew out to new York to audition and now she’s doing that and i was so impressed
people just do stuff and you’re sitting there being impressed.
i am gonna go on the train now soon with a little 3 year old kid and his father and the kid likes trains so they just ride the train.
his name is jasper. i tell them i have a friend who loves trains too but he’s 24 years older.
ok so then after i met again with Matthew! and Hanno! we went to a bar and sat around, and it was quite a nice bar in Bushwick called Johnson’s, whose sister bar i’ve been to years ago with Patrick and Simon and they had a can of beer and a shot for 4 dollars or so and it’s located in the lower east side. i remember the woman serving was into me and i was very flattered but shortly after i was just very drank and barely remember the dancehall(?) club we went to and then walking over Williamsburg bridge to Greenpoint. Both bars they have very good vibes, we all liked the atmosphere and chatted until midnight also about which beach boy hanno looks like the most and why the bass on 60s records is so low while so present in the 70s.
the next day i really tested my friend hanno. i dont know if its NORMAL but these two days were so WINDY. IT was so so so windy in new York, so windy that i asked myself if i ever noticed wind in my life before because it feels like this is the first time that wind annoys the shit out of me. maybe that time and the time in iceland in the countryside but there i didn’t want to walk for hours.
so i would stop in the middle of the sidewalk and say „i don’t wanna walk anymore“ and hanno said „Andreya come one“ and i wouldn’t stop whining about the wind as you know manhattan has the GRID streets and every other street would be just a wind canal.
We walked into the designer stores for fun. Miu Miu had turquoise carpet all over the store and the music sounded like out of a gameboy. hanno told the salesperson that it’s nice music and he said „we have the same music for two years. and the songs are playing at the same time
today i flew from New York into LA, or actually, Burbank, Hollywood.
It is my first time flying into this airport instead of LAX and it couldn’t be a better fit, bob hope airport and I.
But because I am 27 and I am forgetting things, here are just the major events that happened in the last 48h in New York, a city that is dividing my love and heart - and my physical struggle to stay warm in the cold winds.
Today is tuesday. I have twenty minutes until my train arrives.
On Sunday I realized not everything is closed in NYC as it is in catholic Germany.
I went to eat breakfast with my friend h and on our quest to find an authentic bagel shop that is not hiperized we walked deeper into bedstuy and ended up with a egg-bacon-cheese bagel at a fried chicken place that gave me a heartache for the next 6h.
I also drank coffee at this awful cafe which my friend h liked and he laughed at me for being so terrible about it
i was very disappointed at the baristas who were all students and the people inside were all students and it somehow upset me. which i can spare for therapy session.
then i met my friend m who produced most of our upcoming ep in his flat and i met his cat and even though he said i and freaky (name of the cat) would go on well i was very skeptical and freaky was skeptical about me as well (meaning she just didn’t care that i was there) and i don’t blame her. M’s flat is filled with dvds and music and books and a smol studio set up in his room and we talk very much and a lot about music and our lives and it’s the first time i think about all of it again since i’ve left Berlin, like, that this is what I do.
then i met my friend o’s girlfriend, whose house i’m staying at in LA, and she is an actor and singer and in a musical workshop and she told me how she flew out to new York to audition and now she’s doing that and i was so impressed
people just do stuff and you’re sitting there being impressed.
i am gonna go on the train now soon with a little 3 year old kid and his father and the kid likes trains so they just ride the train.
his name is jasper. i tell them i have a friend who loves trains too but he’s 24 years older.
ok so then after i met again with Matthew! and Hanno! we went to a bar and sat around, and it was quite a nice bar in Bushwick called Johnson’s, whose sister bar i’ve been to years ago with Patrick and Simon and they had a can of beer and a shot for 4 dollars or so and it’s located in the lower east side. i remember the woman serving was into me and i was very flattered but shortly after i was just very drank and barely remember the dancehall(?) club we went to and then walking over Williamsburg bridge to Greenpoint. Both bars they have very good vibes, we all liked the atmosphere and chatted until midnight also about which beach boy hanno looks like the most and why the bass on 60s records is so low while so present in the 70s.
the next day i really tested my friend hanno. i dont know if its NORMAL but these two days were so WINDY. IT was so so so windy in new York, so windy that i asked myself if i ever noticed wind in my life before because it feels like this is the first time that wind annoys the shit out of me. maybe that time and the time in iceland in the countryside but there i didn’t want to walk for hours.
so i would stop in the middle of the sidewalk and say „i don’t wanna walk anymore“ and hanno said „Andreya come one“ and i wouldn’t stop whining about the wind as you know manhattan has the GRID streets and every other street would be just a wind canal.
We walked into the designer stores for fun. Miu Miu had turquoise carpet all over the store and the music sounded like out of a gameboy. hanno told the salesperson that it’s nice music and he said „we have the same music for two years. and the songs are playing at the same time
Hey
So its my second third day in LA
and i never finished writing tjis
I will resume later today with new fresh info from los
Anjeles
Sunday, February 24, 2019
my airbnb neighbour has really loud sex
So much has happened that going out last night feels like going out last week.
Yesterday morning my friend h and I went to the Brooklyn Flea market, then we walked over the Brooklyn Bridge where my friend, v interested in architecture, pointed out a Frank Geary building, and we walked with other tourists, talking about other joggers.
My favorite part of walking across brooklyn bridge was walking from the train station to the beginning of brooklyn bridge - the neighborhood, brooklyn heights, had such an amazing atmosphere (actually there was a sign that said the brother of harriett beacher stowe had lived there for example), which ended in a riverside promenade and its breathtaking view. I don't even know if it's a breathtaking view, for me it was just special --- the houses and charm of brooklyn heights by the bridge (residential area) and view filled me with so much happiness that I forgot about myself.
After we crossed the bridge we visited NYU and walked towards the High Line - which is a park build on an abandoned train track in the meatpacking district. Having been a hub for nightclubs and butchers alike in the 90s, it's now almost fully gentrified with fashion offices and similar. I enjoyed the walk, on one of the benches there sat a daughter with her guitar in a guitar bag with her dad, who was clearly "chilling" and it seemed like, ok, he had picked her up from practice and now they are here - for whatever reason - had to wait until they could get to their next appointment in their schedule. or maybe the dad forgot the key to their flat or something
then we walked to NYU. wait do i mess this up actually? maybe we had been to NYU before.
We had walked a lot by then and i could sense a small mood drop in my friend which may or may not have been also due to a big bottle of (sugar free but sweetened) soda he had bought by accident, mistaking it for water, but then eventually consumed it in a time span of 5 minutes - as one does with sodas.
So I suggested my favorite spot in new york - the 99c pizza at times square.
There was another emergency, he had to pee really bad (thanks to the soda i guess)
and we walked from coffee shop to coffee shop but it is nearly impossible to find good free toilets around there. So we went to the public library and walked up to the first floor to use toilets.
When you go into the library, there are guards checking your bags, but sometimes they dont even really check and just wave you through, which is also a little bit unsettling.
we finally reached 99c pizza and even though it is RIGHT AT TIMES SQUARE it is always not very crowded (lol)
I was happy to see my friend thoroughly enjoyed it, he said "from now on i dont want to spend more than a dollar on pizza"
Before we went to the 99cent pizza we went to times square - well it turns out i had been to times square, so i just looked at the street and the billboards again, as one does at times square.
before all of that acutally we saw the singer of incubus in a book store signing a book (or cds?)
I am sorry, I am messing up a lot of the events of this day because it was yesterday and today is today!
We saw a real fight near central park (i really wanted to go to central park and my friend first didnt want to because it was about to get dark but i really pushed for it like a little child) because a cyclist had hit the rear mirror of a car and it fell off and the driver stopped in the middle of the street and ran towards the biker and threw him off the bike and fought him.
I said "ok he did destroy his mirror!" my friend said "andreya people cant just hit people on the street" and he was totally right I was just so confused by what I had seen - this guy from the car just running in the middle of the street as if something REALLY BAD had happened.
In central park we saw the lake half frozen and the ducks hanging out on the frozen part of the lake near the water, which reminded me of my pathetic fandom of catcher in the rye and holden caulfields thoughts on the ducks in the winter in central park and where they go to - he also falls into the lake a little right? and gets really ill. they now have ladders around the lake in case someone falls in. i guess you can just figure out yourself what to do with the ladder once someone falls into a hole in the frozen lake.
Now we really had walked a lot. for a second we thought about going ice skating in central park but then the skating rink was named "trump" and we didn't want to support that. I then went to my airbb and rested for 40 minutes, then went out to meet friends at a show in bushwick but had forgotten my passport.
Then I saw the show but I would say around 8pm my jetlag hits the worst until 11pm and I am in such a sleepy state that I yawn and sigh and it is uncomfortable maybe for other people because it looks like im bored lol
I walked home from the show around midnight and called a friend in LA as it is 3 h time difference.
I am actually bored to write about today but it was a good day today. my airbnb neighbour has really loud sex, im gonna try to sleep. i think im gonna write about today tomorrow, as i went to bushwick, maybe i find a better angle than just writing down what i did.
it sounds like she has really good sex im happy for her!
Yesterday morning my friend h and I went to the Brooklyn Flea market, then we walked over the Brooklyn Bridge where my friend, v interested in architecture, pointed out a Frank Geary building, and we walked with other tourists, talking about other joggers.
My favorite part of walking across brooklyn bridge was walking from the train station to the beginning of brooklyn bridge - the neighborhood, brooklyn heights, had such an amazing atmosphere (actually there was a sign that said the brother of harriett beacher stowe had lived there for example), which ended in a riverside promenade and its breathtaking view. I don't even know if it's a breathtaking view, for me it was just special --- the houses and charm of brooklyn heights by the bridge (residential area) and view filled me with so much happiness that I forgot about myself.
After we crossed the bridge we visited NYU and walked towards the High Line - which is a park build on an abandoned train track in the meatpacking district. Having been a hub for nightclubs and butchers alike in the 90s, it's now almost fully gentrified with fashion offices and similar. I enjoyed the walk, on one of the benches there sat a daughter with her guitar in a guitar bag with her dad, who was clearly "chilling" and it seemed like, ok, he had picked her up from practice and now they are here - for whatever reason - had to wait until they could get to their next appointment in their schedule. or maybe the dad forgot the key to their flat or something
then we walked to NYU. wait do i mess this up actually? maybe we had been to NYU before.
We had walked a lot by then and i could sense a small mood drop in my friend which may or may not have been also due to a big bottle of (sugar free but sweetened) soda he had bought by accident, mistaking it for water, but then eventually consumed it in a time span of 5 minutes - as one does with sodas.
So I suggested my favorite spot in new york - the 99c pizza at times square.
There was another emergency, he had to pee really bad (thanks to the soda i guess)
and we walked from coffee shop to coffee shop but it is nearly impossible to find good free toilets around there. So we went to the public library and walked up to the first floor to use toilets.
When you go into the library, there are guards checking your bags, but sometimes they dont even really check and just wave you through, which is also a little bit unsettling.
we finally reached 99c pizza and even though it is RIGHT AT TIMES SQUARE it is always not very crowded (lol)
I was happy to see my friend thoroughly enjoyed it, he said "from now on i dont want to spend more than a dollar on pizza"
Before we went to the 99cent pizza we went to times square - well it turns out i had been to times square, so i just looked at the street and the billboards again, as one does at times square.
before all of that acutally we saw the singer of incubus in a book store signing a book (or cds?)
I am sorry, I am messing up a lot of the events of this day because it was yesterday and today is today!
We saw a real fight near central park (i really wanted to go to central park and my friend first didnt want to because it was about to get dark but i really pushed for it like a little child) because a cyclist had hit the rear mirror of a car and it fell off and the driver stopped in the middle of the street and ran towards the biker and threw him off the bike and fought him.
I said "ok he did destroy his mirror!" my friend said "andreya people cant just hit people on the street" and he was totally right I was just so confused by what I had seen - this guy from the car just running in the middle of the street as if something REALLY BAD had happened.
In central park we saw the lake half frozen and the ducks hanging out on the frozen part of the lake near the water, which reminded me of my pathetic fandom of catcher in the rye and holden caulfields thoughts on the ducks in the winter in central park and where they go to - he also falls into the lake a little right? and gets really ill. they now have ladders around the lake in case someone falls in. i guess you can just figure out yourself what to do with the ladder once someone falls into a hole in the frozen lake.
Now we really had walked a lot. for a second we thought about going ice skating in central park but then the skating rink was named "trump" and we didn't want to support that. I then went to my airbb and rested for 40 minutes, then went out to meet friends at a show in bushwick but had forgotten my passport.
Then I saw the show but I would say around 8pm my jetlag hits the worst until 11pm and I am in such a sleepy state that I yawn and sigh and it is uncomfortable maybe for other people because it looks like im bored lol
I walked home from the show around midnight and called a friend in LA as it is 3 h time difference.
I am actually bored to write about today but it was a good day today. my airbnb neighbour has really loud sex, im gonna try to sleep. i think im gonna write about today tomorrow, as i went to bushwick, maybe i find a better angle than just writing down what i did.
it sounds like she has really good sex im happy for her!
Friday, February 22, 2019
Was I at times square??
I'm giving myself 20 minutes to write this!!!
Ok so yesterday I flew to New York!
I have planned this trip for a very long time, meaning, I bought the tickets two months ago and haven't planned anything except that I booked an airbnb.
The last time I was in New York was 6 years ago and I wore cloggs with heels in the winter and in the summer I don't remember which shoes I had... I think red vans.
I had a much higher pain tolerance back then because in the winter I would walk around with my hand luggage bag all day in the snow, in heeled shoes.
Some things never change, for example, that I don't have a lot of money for travelling, so I took the cheapest flight (8am from berlin with 6 h layover in oslo) and only booked hand luggage for a month of being away.
I am very confident with my choice of clothing, which I have packed the night before I left.
My bag broke in Oslo, I can't really carry it anymore
I arrived in New York at 9pm and I didnt really know what to feel, I had been emo (meaning hungry and tired) all day, so finding my way to the airbnb was a good distraction from that. I have to admit I was a little bit scared because I didnt have data, wifi at the train stations, and I thought "what if I'm completely wrong, I will never find it".
I did take the wrong train twice, but the train station staff was very nice. It was a weird situation to get nervous about public transport, when in Berlin it's something you do with eyes closed.
I have another thought on public transport in a minute.
but ok first Who would have thought that my CHEAP ASS airbnb (20 per night) in Brooklyn is actually pretty ok, warm(i need it), comfy, with the bidet i ordered (lol), and clean.
I went to bed at midnight and woke up at 4am because i fell asleep on the plane.
at 7am I got up and looked on my phone
hoorah gurr had released a new single! there was stuff i could do on my phone
9.30 am i really want to go outside and get - money from a bank of america; - an adapter; - a sim card
but everything opens at 10am
I am bored
I walk around it's very cold. You know it says 10 degree but the wind is very cold and there is still snow on the sidewalks.
I order a coffee with almond milk (i dont know why seriously) and a croissant at a coffee shop thats called le paris something, wow the croissant is so bad!
I am very tired and I start walking to the next bank of america, 35 minutes away. I meet again the owner of the coffee place on the street and it makes me really happy, maybe I think he's handsome. Even though I am wearing my glasses, because I want to see things, I somehow still feel attracted to people from afar that later turn out to be these kind-of-hot but actually homeless a little crazy people?
I wondered today if I am one of those for other people, because I was singing out loud all day while walking because, i dont know, i was alone
but I love New York (ohmagud i love new york benn here for 10 hours) because everyone seems to do that, and to talk to each other, and is a little bit nuts also
- everyone is wearing airpods
- my daunenjacke baggypants look, situated in brooklyn, is more on the hot-or-homeless-and-a-little-nuts-side
- people sing and talk to themselves out loud, even if theyre normal i guess
- actually maybe they are on the phone and they have airpods
- so iz jus me doin it
wow ok so I needed a plan for today - first necessity was to STAY AWAKE. However, seeing the owner of the shitty coffee shop again made me so happy, i think it made some old feelings about previous stays pop up, too. So my spirit was awake for sure. But then I also walked by a lot of Jewish schools, which made me think about my ex boyfriend, which is maybe not such a nice thing to do when ur alone far away.
I hydrated and bought a sim card. I went to an "antique store" somewhere deeper south but it was closed, i really wanted to buy an analog camera for cheap and not for hipster price. My old one broke. I am sure it will find me, just like i found my old one somewhere in london.
I took the train, just to take the train and it took me to Manhattan! I got off near the world trade center because i was like, well i'm in new york, alone, lets just GET OVER WITH IT RIGHT
at the world trade center i took a photo for the family group chat.
my new goal was:
- to stay awake
- to walk all the way up through soho / bowery, visit NYU law where a friend is gonna study and then more up to 99cent pizza.
If you saw my insta story I was looking for food recs, which were all in brooklyn, but i wasnt but i was too lazy to do another insta story so i google "pizza slice"
I remember 6 years ago I went to something similar but it couldnt be that 99c pizza store because it said it was right near times square
i gave up walking and took two wrong trains
then i walked a little because i was annoyed by taking wrong trains
oh my god im telling you i walked in A SQUARE. i walked right and right and right and right! i am sooo awful at navigating myself.
Suddenly i'm on the broadway! I'm asking myself if this is times square somewhere
there are billboards everywhere
wait where is times square?! is it just like, a bigger street? no right?
I find 99c pizza and it's supopsed to be near times square
you get a pizza for one dollar and i get a sprite because i was like "i'm in america i should get a soda i guess"
when you walk into 99c pizza its a small room and people are standing on each side of the room, like little chickens, pretty close to each other, and they are all eating pizza slices
i found it very odd, but guess what, 2 minutes later i was standing on the right side, eating my pizza, facing the wall - and it wasnt awkward at all! we were just standing there, all the lonely people, facing the wall eating pizza! handing each other the chili flakes!
i really wanted to take a picture but it was too intimate with my fellow pizza eaters
i thought "this is how new yorkers eat pizza, great" and then i thought "ok this is a v touristy area i guess maybe we're all tourists eating pizza facing the wall, thinking this is how new yorkers eat pizza, but its just us dumb cows" but I was fine with it too. i think the real new yorkers just popped by from the office and took it to go.
here is my last thought on public transport. on the way back i watched a spontaneous dance show, that four people started on the platform. i missed two trains and was surprised to be thinking "wow i can just take any train i want."
because usually when i take subways / trains i just have to go somewhere and i cannoooott miss it , and the sooner, the better.
but here i was missing trains! the 4 people were dancing and it made a lot of the audience really happy. one of them had LED lights in his mouth and he hugged a woman with a child.
So many feelings to be felt; i had to go home and rest. I watched to episodes of broad city now and i want to check out this clothing store near me and .....STAY AWAKE.
And I dont know about times square, i will look up now if i was there or not :(
ps I wasnt, i shouldve gone 8 minutes up north.
pps but then i took the train too far anyways and had to walk down, so was I ?
ppps i just googled pics and im still not sure if i was. will go back.
Ok so yesterday I flew to New York!
I have planned this trip for a very long time, meaning, I bought the tickets two months ago and haven't planned anything except that I booked an airbnb.
The last time I was in New York was 6 years ago and I wore cloggs with heels in the winter and in the summer I don't remember which shoes I had... I think red vans.
I had a much higher pain tolerance back then because in the winter I would walk around with my hand luggage bag all day in the snow, in heeled shoes.
Some things never change, for example, that I don't have a lot of money for travelling, so I took the cheapest flight (8am from berlin with 6 h layover in oslo) and only booked hand luggage for a month of being away.
I am very confident with my choice of clothing, which I have packed the night before I left.
My bag broke in Oslo, I can't really carry it anymore
I arrived in New York at 9pm and I didnt really know what to feel, I had been emo (meaning hungry and tired) all day, so finding my way to the airbnb was a good distraction from that. I have to admit I was a little bit scared because I didnt have data, wifi at the train stations, and I thought "what if I'm completely wrong, I will never find it".
I did take the wrong train twice, but the train station staff was very nice. It was a weird situation to get nervous about public transport, when in Berlin it's something you do with eyes closed.
I have another thought on public transport in a minute.
but ok first Who would have thought that my CHEAP ASS airbnb (20 per night) in Brooklyn is actually pretty ok, warm(i need it), comfy, with the bidet i ordered (lol), and clean.
I went to bed at midnight and woke up at 4am because i fell asleep on the plane.
at 7am I got up and looked on my phone
hoorah gurr had released a new single! there was stuff i could do on my phone
9.30 am i really want to go outside and get - money from a bank of america; - an adapter; - a sim card
but everything opens at 10am
I am bored
I walk around it's very cold. You know it says 10 degree but the wind is very cold and there is still snow on the sidewalks.
I order a coffee with almond milk (i dont know why seriously) and a croissant at a coffee shop thats called le paris something, wow the croissant is so bad!
I am very tired and I start walking to the next bank of america, 35 minutes away. I meet again the owner of the coffee place on the street and it makes me really happy, maybe I think he's handsome. Even though I am wearing my glasses, because I want to see things, I somehow still feel attracted to people from afar that later turn out to be these kind-of-hot but actually homeless a little crazy people?
I wondered today if I am one of those for other people, because I was singing out loud all day while walking because, i dont know, i was alone
but I love New York (ohmagud i love new york benn here for 10 hours) because everyone seems to do that, and to talk to each other, and is a little bit nuts also
- everyone is wearing airpods
- my daunenjacke baggypants look, situated in brooklyn, is more on the hot-or-homeless-and-a-little-nuts-side
- people sing and talk to themselves out loud, even if theyre normal i guess
- actually maybe they are on the phone and they have airpods
- so iz jus me doin it
wow ok so I needed a plan for today - first necessity was to STAY AWAKE. However, seeing the owner of the shitty coffee shop again made me so happy, i think it made some old feelings about previous stays pop up, too. So my spirit was awake for sure. But then I also walked by a lot of Jewish schools, which made me think about my ex boyfriend, which is maybe not such a nice thing to do when ur alone far away.
I hydrated and bought a sim card. I went to an "antique store" somewhere deeper south but it was closed, i really wanted to buy an analog camera for cheap and not for hipster price. My old one broke. I am sure it will find me, just like i found my old one somewhere in london.
I took the train, just to take the train and it took me to Manhattan! I got off near the world trade center because i was like, well i'm in new york, alone, lets just GET OVER WITH IT RIGHT
at the world trade center i took a photo for the family group chat.
my new goal was:
- to stay awake
- to walk all the way up through soho / bowery, visit NYU law where a friend is gonna study and then more up to 99cent pizza.
If you saw my insta story I was looking for food recs, which were all in brooklyn, but i wasnt but i was too lazy to do another insta story so i google "pizza slice"
I remember 6 years ago I went to something similar but it couldnt be that 99c pizza store because it said it was right near times square
i gave up walking and took two wrong trains
then i walked a little because i was annoyed by taking wrong trains
oh my god im telling you i walked in A SQUARE. i walked right and right and right and right! i am sooo awful at navigating myself.
Suddenly i'm on the broadway! I'm asking myself if this is times square somewhere
there are billboards everywhere
wait where is times square?! is it just like, a bigger street? no right?
I find 99c pizza and it's supopsed to be near times square
you get a pizza for one dollar and i get a sprite because i was like "i'm in america i should get a soda i guess"
when you walk into 99c pizza its a small room and people are standing on each side of the room, like little chickens, pretty close to each other, and they are all eating pizza slices
i found it very odd, but guess what, 2 minutes later i was standing on the right side, eating my pizza, facing the wall - and it wasnt awkward at all! we were just standing there, all the lonely people, facing the wall eating pizza! handing each other the chili flakes!
i really wanted to take a picture but it was too intimate with my fellow pizza eaters
i thought "this is how new yorkers eat pizza, great" and then i thought "ok this is a v touristy area i guess maybe we're all tourists eating pizza facing the wall, thinking this is how new yorkers eat pizza, but its just us dumb cows" but I was fine with it too. i think the real new yorkers just popped by from the office and took it to go.
here is my last thought on public transport. on the way back i watched a spontaneous dance show, that four people started on the platform. i missed two trains and was surprised to be thinking "wow i can just take any train i want."
because usually when i take subways / trains i just have to go somewhere and i cannoooott miss it , and the sooner, the better.
but here i was missing trains! the 4 people were dancing and it made a lot of the audience really happy. one of them had LED lights in his mouth and he hugged a woman with a child.
So many feelings to be felt; i had to go home and rest. I watched to episodes of broad city now and i want to check out this clothing store near me and .....STAY AWAKE.
And I dont know about times square, i will look up now if i was there or not :(
ps I wasnt, i shouldve gone 8 minutes up north.
pps but then i took the train too far anyways and had to walk down, so was I ?
ppps i just googled pics and im still not sure if i was. will go back.
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